Earnie Off To Everton?

After speculation regarding Robert Earnshaw’s future had all but died down after the press had exhausted the list of clubs to link him with, like a bad case of herpes, the rumours refuse to go away.

Charlton signed Darren Bent and Birmingham landed Emile Heskey, thus ruling out the need for Earnie’s services, while Fulham and Celtic distanced themselves from a move for the pint-sized striker.

But now a strong link to Everton has emerged and this one looks the real deal. Rumours that Wayne Rooney is about to head off to Manchester United for £20 million plus will mean there is money to spend, and with that sort of cash available, Earnshaw’s £3 million-up-front-with-more-to-follow price tag is unlikely to scare off the suits at Goodison Park.

Ominously, manager Lennie Lawrence was yesterday quoted as saying in one Sunday newspaper "There is something brewing” and he was not talking about Arran Lee Barrett making the tea at Ninian Park, “the talk surrounding Earnshaw is very strong”.

Plus, all incoming transfers are to be put on ice until Earnie’s future is resolved. Does this mean there is no money to spend unless he moves on, and, more importantly, if this is the case, just who on earth will Bluebirds.tv be providing the away kit for next season?

More is expected to be revealed by Wednesday.

Some better news is City have officially made their first signing of the season by securing the permanent transfer of Lee Bullock.

"I know that players such as Graham Kavanagh and Willie Boland will probably be starting the season ahead of me in the pecking order," shrugged Bullock. "But it's up to me to force myself into the first team.

With no further signings on the horizon, Richard Langley fannying about with Jamaica in August and if Kav suffers with injuries like he did last season, then Bullock may have a longer run in the side than he first anticipated.

France Show 'Bulldog Spirit' For What It's Worth

Not at all Cardiff-related, but Bluebirds.tv simply has to comment on tonight’s Engerlund vs ‘Johnny Foreigner’ match.

The usual xenophobic dross about ‘Bulldog Spirit’ and foreign teams not liking it ‘up em’ was yet again trotted out in 16 page colour pullouts backed up by tenuous justification as to how an over-rated manager like Sven Goran Eriksson can take an under-achieving, done nothing side like England to European glory.

Just watching those smug morons in the stands who couldn’t tell one end of a bayonet from another, singing the theme tune to the ‘Great Escape’ and stretching their arms out as if they were Jan Aage Fjortoft in a ‘patriotic’ rendition of the Dambusters, needed something spectacular right at the end to wipe the smirks clean off their beer-stained faces, following a seemingly winning Frank Lampard goal.

And boy did they get it.

Earnshaw 'Still' a City Player

The first update in over a week and not much has changed. The stadium is still in the ‘planning’ stage, Lee Bullock is still swanning about in Florida and yet to sign a permanent deal, and surprise, surprise, Robert Earnshaw is still very much a Cardiff City player.

The press, the ink and paper version of a dog chewing an extremely gristly bone, will stop at nothing to link little Earnie with a move anywhere, as long as it’s not Ninian Park.

The stories have become so desperate since no firm bids, official enquires or even casual chats with Sam over a pint of Dark and a bowl of sheep’s testicles, have been made. What constitutes as ‘news’ these days are tedious ‘almost signed for’ non-stories which carry about as much substance as an O.J. Simpson case for defence.

This week Earnie ‘nearly’ became a Birmingham City player. Given the option of a proven goalscorer at domestic and international level, Steve Bruce spent £6 million on Emile Heskey instead, but without even querying Earnshaw’s availability or asking price, how exactly does a ‘nearly’ transfer work?

Is it similar to Rivaldo ‘nearly’ signing for Tottenham, or Lennie ‘nearly’ deploying a tactic other than the ‘high ball up to the little fella’?

It’s never going to happen. It’s pure fantasy.

Until a rival Chairman strolls into Ninian Park with a briefcase containing at least £5 million in used currency, Robert Earnshaw is going nowhere and Bluebirds.tv will proudly sponsor the brightest talent to wear the shirt in the last decade when the first ball is kicked in August.

City made their first summer signing today by taking 16-year-old goalkeeper Scott Allison on a year’s work experience from York. With Arran Lee-Barrett likely to be farmed out to some god-awful dungeon side next season, the tea still needs to be made and Thorney told how wonderful he is on a daily basis.

The club’s listing in Ad Trader worked a treat and Gavin Gordon has fixed himself up with a new club for next season. Notts County warmed to the ‘Offered: goal-shy useless lump, sorry, ‘target man’ available – free to a good home’ advert and promptly offered the former Lincoln man a contract.

Hopefully Gordon can recapture the form that saw him net five goals (yes, in one game) against Rushden a few years ago, and Bluebirds.tv wishes him the best of luck.

Confirmed speculation regarding transfers into Ninian Park have been few and far between. Lennie has confirmed his desire to bring Wales dinosaur Robert Page in to warm the bench, but other names have recently surfaced, Mansfield’s Liam Lawrence and out-of-contract Danny Tiatto.

Australian international Tiatto was touted on Bluebirds.tv weeks ago as a possible signing but as yet no official approach has been made to secure the former Manchester City winger’s services, according to Danny’s brother and agent, Frank – the poor man’s Claude Anelka.

A move for Tiatto is unlikely, due to the player entering his fourth decade and taking into account his colourful disciplinary record. Plus, in a City midfield already devoid of imagination in Kavanagh’s absence, another huff-and-puff player should not be a top priority.

"I may not be the most creative player” Tiatto snarled, “but what I lack in that aspect, I make up for with heart and soul”

Roughly translated as “I make up for general crapness by kicking lumps out of the opposition”, a quality that may endear him to Ninian Park supporters still pining for Gareth Stoker and his ‘unique’ style of play.

However, serving a third ban of the season and pocketing around £10k a week in the process for doing sod all is bound to grate on even the most gladiatorial City fan.